True statement: When Trent and I got married we wanted to help couples improve their marriage. I don’t know if I’ve explained that in such a way that you understand how asinine of a statement it is. When Trent and I got married… as in before we had any true experience as a married couple… we thought we could help people who had been married for decades improve their marriages.
It’s now 15 years later, and we realize how hard marriage can actually be. We’ve lived through the 7-year itch. We’ve navigated the shifts that happen when you add kids to the family. We’ve been really rotten to each other and had to seek and grant forgiveness. It’s 15 years later, and unlike those naive kids who thought they had something to say, we really believe we can help you improve your marriage and make it stronger.
At the same time, we realize that some of you are dealing with things we couldn’t possibly imagine. This is not meant to be the end all be all of marriage advice. So, if you’re really struggling please consider getting professional help. Your marriage is worth it.
How to Improve Your Marriage and Make it Stronger
We believe if there’s one single thing you need to improve your marriage it’s Jesus. God created marriage, so He knows how it works best. The Bible is riddled with passages specifically meant to help with marriage. Plus, as a Christian you have the Holy Spirit to convict you when you’re wrong and empower you to do what’s right. Does being a Christian ensure you’ll have a great marriage? Not hardly. You and your spouse still have free will. You can choose to do what’s right, but you can also choose to do what’s wrong. Can you have a good marriage without being a Christian? Yep. But it’s not all it could be.
This article is just an overview of what we’ll be sharing with you over the next four weeks. It may seem like we’re showing all our cards, and maybe we are. But, I want you to be aware of what’s coming, so you can mark your calendars or (for those of you on our email list) make sure you’re opening the emails you know you’re going to need.
Here are the next four blogs we’ll be writing and the bullet points for each one.
- Be humble.
- Be a good listener.
- Avoid extreme statements. (You always. You never.)
- Know when to take a time-out.
- Ask for and offer forgiveness.
- Communication is key.
- Remember that unity is more important than winning.
- Keep an eternal perspective.
- Serve your spouse.
- Prioritize time together.
- Have more sex.
- Have fun as a family.
marriage + money: 5 tips for a healthy relationship
- Combine your finances.
- Set goals together.
- Create a budget (and stick to it).
- Be generous.
- Get help.
In each blog, I’ll share some personal stories that illustrate our personal struggles and how we overcame them. I promise you, we’re not one of those couples that never fight... If there’s something you’re specifically interested in, please let us know in a comment! And if you have any specific questions about something you know is coming leave those in a comment as well.
Marriage can be extremely hard, but we believe sticking together is worth it. Doing the right things and relying on God instead of yourself is worth it. It’s not always easy… but it’s the better way.